阿比-艾莉爸爸 成長歷奇

Stories about me, my family and my daughters, Abigail & Eliana.

Abigail Jackline--Father's joy. To Connie and me, Abigail is a wonderful blessing from God, our precious jewel. God blessed us with Abigail as Connie and I went through the journey of infertility.

Eliana Faith--God answers. God hears our cries and heals us not only emotionally, but He also gives us Eliana, a precious gift, as a sign of his faithfulness.

Thursday, May 07, 2009

為了幾個家庭傷痛 Grieving for a few families

近日正留意著兩宗意外的發展,一直記掛著當中傷痛的心靈。

一宗是較早前年初在落馬洲 釀成六人死亡的交通意外。司機因醉酒,導致他駕駛的中型貨車與對線的士相撞,釀成慘劇。六位受害人都是有家庭的父親,而且是家中重要的經濟支柱。這次人為的意外為這些家庭帶來無比的傷痛;將近的父親節亦會再一次勾起他們的傷痛。

最令我痛苦的卻是當我把自己代入肇事司機的角色中,我真會感到萬分懊悔;很想補救及得到寬恕。報導的片段很觸動我—他曾在提訊後步出法院,向庭外示威的死者家屬下跪道歉:對唔住,我害咗六個家庭,好後悔,我好錯。面對被告突如其來跪地道歉,六名死者的十多名親屬卻未為所動,更冷言不接受被告道歉,一名男家屬怒斥六個家庭支拄無咗呀!個個無晒老豆,無咗仔呀,你今時今日跪係度做咩啫,冇意思㗎!而另一女死者家屬亦拒絕被告道歉說:「你賠番個大哥畀我就接受(道歉)!」死者馮志偉的叔叔馮建成,事發當日向特首曾蔭權下跪請求重罰肇事司機。「為什麼司法制度能夠容忍這種司機?特首說盡快跟進,究竟有無檢討刑罰是否足夠?我們幾家人,每次過堂,個心都好像被剁了一下!你知不知有多難受?對不起有什麼用!」馮直言﹕「這是個心理關口,無可能接受道歉,無可能原諒!如果法庭重判,他坐完監,履行完自己應得的懲罰,面壁思過,重新做人,再來跟我道歉!到時,恨已消了,我就考慮原諒!難道這不公平嗎?

換了我是被告,面對著一班死者家屬,我會很內咎、沮喪,覺得做什麼也不能彌補過錯。被告羅少權坦言早料到會被痛罵。「我本身是做錯了!他們指摘我,我怎麼彌補?是不是一句對不起就算數?如果我是死者家屬,我也不能接受!」他說﹕我自己寫了封信,想寄出去給6家人,但我想作用不大,反而害到他們心情難過,我自己做錯,想幫他們那邊,也沒能力去幫,錯就錯了,怪就要讓他們怪。

這案件仍在審訊中。在最近的一次耹訊,約20多人的死者家屬一如往常到庭聽審,他們於粉嶺法庭門外拉起橫額,部分人得悉被告獲准保釋後,表現得相當不滿,直指「誤殺竟然可以保釋,不是幾多錢的問題,根本不應批准保釋!」當被告離開法庭時,眾家屬尾隨高呼認着他啊,他就是殺人兇手,後面有6個人永遠跟着你!被告未有停下,只管繼續低頭步行離開。過去幾個月來,被告聲稱晚晚受良心譴責睡不着,「只好給死者燒香,在廟宇裏面做自己應分的事……飲酒,我講也沒用,希望戒了它。」車禍後他開始失業,「開飯都成問題,今月未交租,唯有打散工,搬貨。」他有個7歲女兒跟妻子住在內地,「全香港最大新聞就是我,不想給女兒知……」

當我代入被告,容許我說我心裡很同情他。從眾家屬在法庭外對被告的控訴可見意外帶來很深的憤怒。若我是被告,沒想是被寬恕原諒,我連相信透過受罰補償的方法也感到渺茫。錯是錯了,但我仍盼望被告身邊能有人願意陪他同行,面對後果與責任。

這誤殺意外令我想起聖經中神為誤殺的也設立逃城安置這些人。期待對這些經文有更深的了解。對罪帶來的consequences and brokenness, God cares.

另一宗是前兩天有女工被鐵閘壓死的意外:
慘遭二百磅鐵閘壓死的慈母林中偉,生前有一個夢,盼兒女學業有成,一家人環遊世界,但如今美夢成空,子女愁對本周日的母親節及十餘日後的亡母誕辰,在台灣讀大學的二十一歲長女,事發當天趕回港,昨日攙扶哭成淚人的父親四處奔波辦理母親後事,怒指家中經濟已陷困境,殮葬成疑,有關部門仍是「光說不做」。明日是我生日,過兩日是母親節,十九日又是母親生日,每年五月原都是一家人最歡樂的日子,可是今年五月沒有母親,不知怎樣過?」二十一歲劉妙玲是林中偉的長女,前日從台灣返港後趕到紅磡事故現場,看到平日硬朗的父親失去妻子,滿眼淚痕,她知道目前要強忍悲慟,擔負起家庭的重責。丈夫說:「我一定會追究……,發現鐵閘有問題,無人處理,今次只係我太太唔好彩。」長女妙玲硬咽說:媽咪在我們心目中好重要,這件事對我們衝擊很大。兩父女語畢都泣不成聲。劉妙玲在台灣高雄輔英科技大學 讀護理系一年級,十六歲的弟弟是應屆會考生,十歲的三妹讀小五,僅六歲幼妹讀小一,妙玲提起自己一家曾經是快樂溫馨的家庭時,倍感悲傷。年僅六歲幼女未懂事,以為母親去天堂旅行,每日為慈母祈禱,又寫信叫她早日回來,妙玲和二弟聞言頓感哀傷,不敢哭出來,還要安慰妹妹,但是,姊弟對自己前途,則茫然不知該怎辦?



當我知道死者丈夫從事與鐵閘相關的行業時更覺傷痛,代入他去想時更會因自己的專業知識而更覺太太受害的可憐與無奈。

每逢佳節倍思親。我能體會因這兩件意外這些家庭所背負著的沉痛,我很渴望他們身邊有人在他們旁邊與他們同哭、同分擔這份悲痛grief,令當前的路也能明朗化。願他們終能得到安慰。

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

2 important mentors that shape my life at Regent

These two are my professors at Regent--Darrell Johnson and Rikk Watts. They both inspire me in many ways in my first year of study. I am so impressed by their love to Jesus, which inspire me to know our Lord Jesus more personally, with a deeper conviction.

My first encounter with Darrell was during the orientation. While I was overwhelmed by the culture shock and unforeseen reality, God used Darrell to speak into my heart. (see this previous post) The benediction he proclaimed in the chapel is still vividly pictured in my mind. Darrell has a caring pastoral heart that he's like a spiritual father to me. I only had a course with him this year, on the soul of ministry. From the lectures, I start to recognize signals given by my body, allowing me to pay attention to the needs physically and spiritually. I am also "aware" of my identity, that I can also be Jesus' beloved disciple. To me, it is a profound experience. Rather than a deep yearning of seeking recognition and affirmation (from God or others), I am now at ease for I know that I'm loved and accepted by God. In the future, I really wish to have more of Darrell's lectures (especially on preaching and pastorla care) if God wills.
Rikk is my professor of the New Testament Foundation course. Rikk impressed me with his passion to Jesus. I am always touched when he talks about Jesus. Rikk is a great scholar and he enlightens me especailly the way to read Scriptures and the Gospels with a historical aspect. I now notice that it's very important to have a proper worldview in order to understand the Scriptures. What was it like to Jews and Romans in the 1st century? What were their concerns? How did Jesus spoke to them? I find it very fruitful to be in Rikk's lectures. I am also inspired by his saying that it would be great to preach something about Jesus in every sermon. I hope I can also help others to know about Jesus in my teachings/sermons. I shall miss his exegesis class (how to interpret/read the bible) next year, but hopefully I can take other courses with him in the future.
I can see their love to Jesus in their words and deeds and I'm deeply touched. I really wish to be like them one day, having the same passion to witness/share about Jesus to others.

Abby's Adoption Story on TVB